A Lapse in Resolve
by Nalledia
Summary: A young member of the Blades questions his place among their ranks. Short prompt by Hugo98


**A/N:** A quickie writing challenge/prompt by **Hugo98**

 **The Elder Scrolls: Skyrim**

Fanfiction

Disclaimer:

I do not own Skyrim or any of the NPCs, Quests or game dialog. The rest of the characters are mine.  
Enjoy and please review!

I shuffled, uneasy in the presence of the Grandmaster of the Blades, and the older members gathered here, along with a few new recruits such as myself. My armor fit well, the Akaviri katana I carried comfortable and wielded with sure ease.

"Reports say the dragon has been sighted a few leagues southeast of here. The dragon has not yet struck, but we believe it is scouting the village. We will send a contingent out as soon as this meeting is over, with seasoned warriors guiding a few Initiates. We'd like some volunteers," the Grandmaster called, her voice strong and sharp. She was blind in one eye thanks to a dragon hurling rocks and debris at her, but her sight was no less sharp.

"You," she pointed at me. "Join the contingent, I can see you're looking excited about it."

I flinched, then straightened in a salute. "Yes, Grandmaster!" I moved to stand by the contingent of fifteen.

It certainly wasn't excitement that had me fidgeting. And it wasn't fear, either. But would they understand what I felt? I doubted that.

* * *

There were two healers, three mages, five archers and five swordsmen in my contingent, myself included amongst the last five. My sister was one of the archers, seven years older than I was and more experienced, too. She was almost as good as a Bosmer with the bow.

"You look worried, little brother," she crouched beside me at the campfire. We were just shy of the dragon's lair.  
"I… am," I confessed slowly. "I'm not sure about… about _killing_ the dragon."

She looked at me curiously, waiting for me to continue.

"Well, I guess what I mean is, isn't there another way? I don't believe all dragons are bent on power and destroying, but I also know that most are, and that if they are allowed to rise again, that we shall be enslaved again," I sighed. "Didn't Paarthurnax find a way to curb his will? What if we could reason with dragons, show them another way, as Paarthurnax changed himself?"

My sister watched with patient curiosity. "I would say, if we could reason with dragons, there would be many more still alive than there currently are," she looked up over the fire. "Perhaps you can try talking to it tomorrow, see if it will hear reason. But if it doesn't, we _must_ kill the dragon. You know that, right?"  
I nodded. "Yeah, I know."  
"You didn't have to join the Blades just because I did, you know that too, right?"

I looked back at my sister, waiting for her to look at me. "I know that, and it was _my_ choice to join the Blades. I knew what I was getting into when I started this."

She smiled fondly, ruffling my light hair. "Good. Get some rest – whether you talk down the dragon tomorrow or not, it'll be a hard day for us all." She stood, breathing in the cool night air of Skyrim before heading to her bedroll.

My sister was right: tomorrow would be the trek up the mountain to reach the dragon, and then fight it if we had no choice.

I wondered if I was cut out to be a dragon hunter of the Blades.

* * *

Fit or not, the trek up a mountain in full armor with weapons was uncomfortable, tiring. My lungs burned by the time we reached what should have been the dragon's lair, finding nothing but crumbling old Word Wall.

"Spread out! Check the surrounding area for any traces of the dragon! Report back as soon as possible, or use the horns when you've found it!" our commander shouted, waving a hand to get us to spread out. I stood still for a moment, taking the time to look around, acquaint myself with the surroundings. It was a small, cliffed-in area, with an overhang above.

If I was a dragon, I'd stay on the overhang…. I nodded to myself, setting about trying to find a way to the top.

Noon came and went, and with no sign of the dragon, my fellow Blades were growing restless.

I panted, wiping the sweat from my brow when I finally stopped, about to give up my search when a seam in the cliff caught my eye. I frowned, inching closer with a hand on the hilt of my katana.

The seam revealed itself to be a cleverly concealed stairway, steep and narrow. I'd have to unsheathe my katana now if I needed to use it….Or take my chances.

I decided on the latter.

The stairway curved, finally taking me out to the top, looking over the stunning view below. Who could have thought seeing Skyrim from so high up would be so absolutely breathtaking? Is this what dragons looked down on, every time they flew?

"I can't believe this…" I breathed, stepping closer to the edge, too lost in the beauty of it all to care about anything else.

A snort and a rumble was my only warning before I was launched into the air, screaming and flailing desperately.

Fear gripped by bones as the ground rushed closer, dreading the impact.

Maybe this was a dream.

Maybe I'd wake before the impact.

Maybe I'd find wings.

 _Oh, Talos! Don't let me die like this!_

* * *

I sucked in air as I bolted upright, kicking back the blankets of my bed in Sky Haven Temple. I stared around me, finding my brothers and sisters in arms around me, all of us safe.

Cut out for the Blades…? Definitely not. Not after this.


End file.
